Being a parent is so much more then just giving birth and raising babies. It is actually a very challenging job, and one we cannot simply resign or run away from.
But what that is sad is that in modern times, parents and their kids (at least a majority of them) have hectic lives with both parents working and also kids being put through various classes and lessons....such as tuition, piano classes, ballet classes, art classes, religious classes or religious school (for the Muslims), and heaven knows a myriad of other classes...
Because many families have both parents working, they do not have time to nurture their children, leaving them with maids, baby sitters or having to go through all those classes and lessons...
It is hard,but parents do need to step up their game or risk their kids getting into the wrong company and becoming delinquents.
Recognizing the importance to help parents enhance their parenting skills as well as in the hope of promoting good family values, Positive Parenting and KidZania have joined forces to organize the Parenting Talk-cum-Forum Series....
At the launch of the event, Consultant Paediatrician cum Positive Parenting Chairman, Datuk Dr Zulkifli Ismail said that family should come first, and that Positive Parenting and KidZania want parents to spend time with their offsprings and build memories and strong relationships together. It is believed children with strong relationships with their parents will develop good moral values, which are essential for building their characters....
In case you do not know it, Positive Parenting is Malaysia's pioneer expert-driven parenting educational programme on child health, development and nutrition, teen issues and family wellness, initiated by the Malaysia Paediatric Association (MPA) since 2000
The Parenting Talk-cum- Forum series launch was officiated by Yang Berusaha En Ahmad Bin Rashid, Director of Counseling and Psychology Division, Department of Social Welfare Malaysia, representing Yang Berhormat Dato' Seri Rohani Abdul Karim, Minister of Women, Family and Community Development.
In conjunction with the launch, the first three Child and Family Development Supplement series was unveiled. This supplement focuses on what parents can do to encourage a child's love for learning, ways to strengthen family ties and how parents could communicate in a positive manner with their kids...
En Shahrul Nizar Bin Ahmad, Mayor of KidZania Kuala Lumpur mentioned that KidZania Kuala Lumpur tries to instill "Learn Life Today" where KidZania lets children learn life values through experience in role-play activities. With similar value proposition, KidZania aim that the Parenting Forum will also be able to empower parents with accurate, evidence-based and practical information on modern parenting that focuses on injecting positive family values....
We got to enjoy the KidZania percussion performance as well as part of the launch....before adjourning for a simple but delicious lunch at the Parent's Lounge...
I decided to check out the talks which were definitely very eye opening and enlightening.
The first talk was by Associate Professor Dr Alvin Ng, Clinical Psychologist on " Effective Parenting to Raise Children with Positive Behavior"
Dr Alvin suggested we make a chart with 3 columns and write down all our complaints in one column, then the positive behavior and points in the second column and last but not least, in the third column, we have to fill up the skills or what we are looking and hoping to nurture in our kids....
After writing everything down, we should cut out or tear off column 1 with all the complaints and throw it away and focus on both the positive behavior as well as the skill we want our kids to have. Dr Alvin did mention that this chart is good to use even for your spouse or employee or such......if you want to try it out...
Besides that, we should also quickly learn to teach our kids to "Stop that and do this instead" , or well, diverting their attention from something harmful to something more interesting instead of just telling them to just stop it... as kids tend to want to do the things they are not suppose to do even more when you stop them doing it...without giving them an alternate activity or reasoning...
Punishing your child does not benefit anyone... so we shouldn't use corporal punishment that much. Dr Alvin stresses that we should always stop and take a FOTO (Focus on the Objective)....
The second talk was about "Disciplining Dilemma: Whose problem is it anyway? Parents vs Child... by Parenting Columnist, Ms Ruth Liew...
Ms Ruth talked about ages and stages and how kids learned differently through different stages...and as parents, what matters most is to put our children's health and safety first above everything else...
We should also address our children's needs for movement/ changes and routine....
Sometimes, as parents we tend to overdo things as well.. for example, children tend to get loud whenever they are happy or excited and we would try to chide them and tell them to be quiet.. but when they are quiet then we start admonishing them about being so quiet....Now.. whose problem is that...??!!
When it comes to discipline, discipline is when our kids learn to behave when playing with their friends and so on... As parents, we should learn to appreciate what our children's strengths are and encourage what they are good at.... and this is how they improve their self discipline as the betterthey are, the more self disciplined they automatically become...
You are doing a great job when your kids do not need you to tell them what to do... and allow the kids to make mistakes as it is the best lesson for kids and even adults... We always learn best from making mistakes...
The above quote is just exactly as it is... how is it when if we continuously harm our own child by hitting them it is discipline? Many child abuse victim die from this kind of 'discipline' when the adults do not know how to stop.....
Before we blame the kid, we should check our own behavior as well.. we want our kids to accept our ideas and solutions... we want to protect them and help them.. we want to teach them but somehow we are not a role model and we do a lot of wrong things in front of them as well... and somehow we want them to stop making mistakes... now whose fault is that...
Children normally model themselves after their parents and then their peers... and last but not least... if we do not learn to respect the little people in our lives, how can we expect them to respect us!!!!!
Think about it...
As a parent, I definitely found this very enlightening and learn something new as to how to handle our kids without being too harsh on them or robbing them of their childhood....
This is really good and so, parents interested in taking part at the next Talk-cum-Forum scheduled in March and June 2016 should look out for updates at www.mypositiveparenting.org or like them on FB
I think its great that you cover so many of these parenting events. It's great content to spread out to people who might really need to know how to handle children. Great post Miera. :)
ReplyDeleteOh my... The KZ mascot is so adorable! Nice write up. Its a good post to share with parents out there. :D
ReplyDeleteHaha, didn't know the mascot actually looks like that. It's great to have such events for parents. Learning tips and skills on how to handle kids :)
ReplyDeleteWhat a great event it was. I bet you learnt plenty as a parent!
ReplyDeleteGood stuff. But to be honest, I hear alot of these western ways to raise a child nowadays, but I also do think our Asian way of upbringing & being strict with kids can also be good for the kids... Keep in mind that you are parent first before friend.
ReplyDeleteWow! I think is a very good talk as parenting in the modern world is totally different from the time of our parents. You certainly need to up your game as there are so many distraction nowadays!
ReplyDeleteI am agree that let child learn from their mistake because is a part of growing. This is a very meaningful talk, thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteYup, I'm agreed that children should learn from their mistake, like that only can let them grow stronger!
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing what you have learnt there. Nice tips here.
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ReplyDeletemy time do not have kidzania...I wanted to know what they do inside there...
can they make a program for adults a? hahahah
Wow I love how Kidzania actually organising the parenting talk! Although never been to Kidzania before but I know many kids love the place! hehe
ReplyDeleteIs very important that children should learn from their mistake. Nice sharing
ReplyDeleteKidzania hampir like 3 x a year buat launch event je heheee
ReplyDeleteThis is a very good talk not only for parents but for everyone too. We have to keep the positive vibes not only when it comes to children but everyone.
ReplyDeletemiera, u r good in parenting. I can see u being such a great bff to ur daughter :)
ReplyDeleteHaving fun at Kidzania and my first time step in Kidzania . Congrats to Kidzania for bringing in more Co-partners to given more experience to kids in Malaysia.
ReplyDeleteLooks like a fun and informative event. I always listen to dr Alvin Ng on the radio too
ReplyDeleteGreat informative event! everybody should learn positive parenting... but not applicable for me atm hehehe
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