Oh gosh, what a heading... it is NOT my dear HUSBAND... (or at least not up until now, and hopefully not ever...) but it is a story of many women out there.
Ok, there are so many romantic stories of husbands and wives getting married and having a family etc, and sometimes along the way, the wife quits her job and just stay at home to manage the kids.
Guess what ladies? It is in my opinion, a BIG and BAD mistake. I am not trying to burst all the honeymoon bubbles or any such thing and you may like to condemn me say I am jealous or whatever... but think about it carefully.. and you will know why.
Cost of living has risen so much over the years and even for a husband earning about RM10k a month, which I have personally witnessed, maintaining a family with that amount is just about barely enough.
Don't believe me? How much do you spend daily at the market? Is RM10 or RM20 enough to set food on the table for a family of four or five? It could, if you leave out the meat , prawns , squid and fish, I guess and go vegetarian...but if you were to buy the meat or seafood, it is NOT enough.
Eating out is even worse, per person need at very least RM6 (if you are thrifty enough and opt for just plain water with your meals) at a normal stall or small shop, or RM8-10 at a food court nowadays....
Many people sadly do not have insurance as well, finding it hard to maintain it.
So imagine these scenarios....
Husband works, wife stays at home to take care of the kids with no income other then what husband gives.... one day husband has an affair and wife finds out.... but what is the wife to do or what can she do? She could probably just make a fuss and continue to be forced to tolerate her husband because leaving him, she would have to leave the security of her home and many women don't want that.
Husband works, wife stays at home to take care of the kids with no income other then what husband gives. Husband finds a lovely girl and fall in love with her and wants to divorce wife..what is the wife to do?
OK... ok... this only applies to playboy husbands, and maybe your husband is the faithful type who worships the very ground you walk on? And... you have him by the balls maybe???
What happens if and when your husband suddenly falls very ill or has an accident or dies? Have you thought of this? He is suddenly unable to work and how are you going to manage the family or yourself then?
If he has an insurance, great.... if you already have some savings set aside, great!! But many women do not have that much savings, and if they do.... how long do you think those savings can last you???
Therefore, what I am trying to advocate here is that it is important that even if the wife wants to take life easier, she should find a source of income, somehow, someway which is not from her husband...
You can work as a part time unit trust (like yours truly) or insurance agent when your husband is not around and kids are at school, or you can start a small business baking cookies and cakes and selling them via facebook or to neighbours etc, a small business you have a passion for, you can also start blogging (like yours truly) if you are good at telling your stories, just do not rest on your laurels and depend on one source of income.
It is the cold hard sad truth and in my experience as a unit trust consultant and a friend to people, I have seen all this with my own eyes.
I am not trying to cause any chaos, but take time to reflect on what I have to say... and you should understand what I mean....
Learn to be independent!!! A small source of income of your own could save your life and if you are so lucky to have a good faithful husband and also a long happy marriage, look as it as your own additional spending money!!!!
Check out this video about a woman's story because her husband drink and drive and got involved in an accident..
It probably is fictional here but it has happened to a lot of women - don't believe me? Ask the GROs at the bars or prostitutes- the sober ones at least, not the drugged up ones which we know are there because they need money for a fix...
Which women chooses prostitution as a career ??? Admittedly there are a small group who does it because they need their drug fix, then there are some forced into it by some gangsters, but surprisingly if you want to know, quite a big majority of them are divorced or widowed with kids and this is their way of putting food on the table and managing their families!!!
(pictures via google, and for decorative purposes only and youtube-and are not mine)
sometimes we are need to understand their situation why become like this. sympaty with them..but various good method will help actually, nowadays, government also help woman or widows and give them support with skill...such as menjahit, berniaga or etc...
ReplyDeleteI do agree but sometimes these women are forced to do this because they want fast and easy money... i have actually had the chance to talk to them before... and have some aquaintance... they do not have much money, and nothing, and no skills or support, thus this is the fastest way (albeit the wrong way) to make quick money
DeleteThe Issues is when forced by 'someone' who ever love their before...yes im agree that is fastest way...to be like this and make money
DeleteTruth hurts, thanks for sharing this~
ReplyDeletethanks for dropping by Happy Walker.... and yes.. the truth always hurts...
ReplyDeleteNice write ups! So true...
ReplyDeleteit's sad but true... I have met some people in this position so I know how they feel and their point of view
ReplyDeleteVery interesting and amazing article. Thanks for sharing.
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