Is there any love for me -Part 3

(for your info, this is a true story that happened to someone I know..)

Continued from here (Part 1) and here (Part 2)

This went on for a few years. She held up by self harming herself. At school, her grades fell and she skipped classes. 

She was also caught stealing a couple of times. Books, candies... Things that made her living hell more livable and also in a tiny attempt for attention.

She found her escape in books... Tons and tons of books. Enid Blyton's fairy tales books, Secret Seven series, Nancy Drew series, Famous Five series, Sweet Dreams, Sweet Valley Twins, Sweet Valley High, all the mythological stories and everything fanciful.. 

    

This was that that gave a a reason to move on while bearing her terrible secret. Her escapism from the harsh brutal reality that was her life.

When things got too bad, self harming let her feel the external pain and forget the pain she had bottled up inside her.

Rachel grew up like any normal teenager. She hungered for love and acceptance. Somehow this hunger betrayed her and as an older teenager by the time she was 15, 16,  boys ignored her ... And the ones that flitted around her was after one thing as well. She did not seem to fit in a anywhere. While her friends had best friends they rely on a lot, she hardly had anyone.. Just perhaps, a couple of other girls who accepted her presence.

But these girls gave her solace and a place to escape. And that made her feel normal. Being an older teenager, she started lying to Cee and her mom that she had afternoon activities and classes and hung out at her friends places instead or in school. Never mind she hardly ever joined the actual activities. It allowed her escape and so the unwanted sexual relations  very much lessened as she tries staying out as much as she could.

It still happened at times when Cee could get her alone but the frequency was much lesser.

Rachel managed to pass both her SRP and SPM with acceptable grades against all odds. When she finished her finals and got out from school, she could not further her studies as her mother had gambled whatever money she had and whatever was left of it was also squandered by Cee.

Rachel foolishly thought she could perhaps seek her paternal father's assistance in entering a college or something but he just did not want anything to do with her.

She was sad and realised she could only ever depend on herself. It was useless trying to count on either of her parents.

Finally she went to work. (to be continued)


pictures via Google